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A New Must-Read FAQ about Canada

#1 User is offline   Jerle 

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  Posted 21 June 2004 - 05:30 PM

* http://www.allowe.com/Humor/Book/Actual%20...ut%20Canada.htm

Kha'tie made me read this. :blink:

Hippo racing? :evil:

(Yes, since I figured this had to do with Mysterium, it should go here. :D )

*Credit to Erithan and Salar for this. :D *
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#2 User is offline   Mathew 

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Posted 21 June 2004 - 06:24 PM

:blink: Those are good, Jerle! Other recommended reading:

The Canadian Temperature Conversion Guide

(Degrees are in Fahrenheit)



50 above - New Yorkers turn on the heat. Canadians plant gardens.

40 above - Californians shiver uncontrollably. Canadians sunbathe.

35 above - Italian cars won't start. Canadians drive with the windows down.

32 above - Distilled water freezes. Canadian water gets thicker.

20 above - People in Florida wear coats, gloves and wool hats. Canadians throw on t-shirts.

15 above - Californians begin to evacuate the state. Canadians go swimming.

zero - New York landlords finally turn up the heat. Canadians have the last cook-out before it gets cold.

10 below - People in Miami cease to exist. Canadians lick flag poles.

20 below - Californians fly away to Mexico. Canadians throw on a light jacket.

40 below - Hollywood disintegrates. Canadians rent videos.

60 below - Mt. St. Helen's freezes. Canadian Girls Scouts begin selling cookies door to door.

80 below - Polar bears begin to evacuate the Arctic. Canadian Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets cold enough.

100 below - Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Canadians pull down their ear flaps.

173 below - Ethyl alcohol freezes. Canadians get frustrated when they can't thaw their kegs.

287 below - Microbial life survives on dairy products. Canadian cows complain of farmers with cold hands.

460 below - ALL atomic motion stops. Canadians start saying "Cold'nuffor ya?"

500 below - Hell freezes over. The Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup.
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#3 User is offline   CAGrayWolf 

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  Posted 21 June 2004 - 07:45 PM

:evil: I like just wasted over an hour of my precious life on that site ... and it hurts. :blink:
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#4 User is offline   Rishahnu 

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Posted 21 June 2004 - 08:01 PM

Being a Canadian, I must say, those are both quite accurate documents. Especially the hippo thing.
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#5 User is offline   Erithan 

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Posted 21 June 2004 - 10:50 PM

Rishahnu, on Jun 21 2004, 10:01 PM, said:

Being a Canadian, I must say, those are both quite accurate documents. Especially the hippo thing.

I'll cya tomorrow nite at the races Rishahnu.

Eri,
(who wears sandals until her toes start to get cold some time in mid to late October)
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#6 User is offline   T'resah the Scrivener 

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Posted 22 June 2004 - 12:19 AM

:blink:

Hey, that's how I can save money...walk along the train tracks from Vancouver. If I start now, I'll get there about September. If I don't get hit by a CP freight train. Maybe I'll hitch a ride from the hippos, or the boy's choir bus. As far as Calgary, but then I'll have to veer a bit south...never mind. Besides, I have trouble with the dress code.

But that's hilarious.

T'resah, wondering if Italian women are hanging out in certain Vancouver nightclubs...
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#7 User is offline   JohnLynch 

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Posted 22 June 2004 - 02:16 AM

Mathew, on Jun 22 2004, 10:24 AM, said:

20 above - People in Florida wear coats, gloves and wool hats. Canadians throw on t-shirts.

This is so true*

* provided 20 Farenheit is around 15 degrees celcius.
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#8 User is offline   Kha'tie 

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  Posted 22 June 2004 - 08:55 AM

*remembers fondly the evening she and TP met at the Hippo races when TP was licking a pole...* :blink:
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